Rocket Cheese

For keeps

2012-01-06T11:45:00.000-08:00

It's been ages since I wrote here. No reason why. I think I am just busy enjoying you both and not taking time for reflecting on it. But look at you two! You are such good people to live with and to know. I couldn't be luckier.

November - time to remember

2009-11-15T08:00:00.000-08:00

It's the Sunday after Dave's birthday and you are both down in the basement "playing". You are over tired from the birthday party last night. I'm proud of you. The screaming matches are frequent, as your tempers are very short. BUT the peace that fills the gaps between the fights is still there. I can see how hard you are trying the remember fairness and compassion and forgiveness. I know very well how it feels to be so tired that you want to scream. I think I feel that way today too. Should I have let you stay up past 9pm last night? Should I have put you to bed 2 hours earlier and had you wake up fresh and chipper? Life is short. We will live it to the fullest. I have always said that a person remembers the nights that they stayed up too late more fondly than the nights they went to bed early.

Remembering the nights that I stayed up late gives me a very warm and happy feeling. My parents loved to entertain their friends at our house when I was growing up. When the party was in full swing, I was there. When the grow-ups got out the guitars, I was listening. When I finally yawned a very long and loud yawn, my Mother would tuck me into bed and return to the party. I would often stretch my late night out a little bit longer and sneak to the top of the stairs to sit and listen and watch a bit longer. By that time, the guitars were being past from person to person, often with broken strings and a bit out of tune, but that didn't matter. It still sounded good - the sound of people living and laughing and staying up late.

So, we will go to bed early tonight and have sweet dreams of the nights we stayed up late celebrating life. Sleep will come fast and it will nurture our tired bodies. We will be strong again in time for the next late night - another time to remember waiting to happen.

2009-07-17T15:57:00.000-07:00

My Hannah, who is 7 years old. 7 is a lucky number. I will remember the eve of your 7th birthday forever. You burst into the sweetest tears about the milestone that lay ahead. You just didn't want to turn 7. The birthday was exciting. The party was going to be perfect. The gifts were all welcome but the passage of time....the end of your 6th year and the beginning of your 7th year was too different. 6 was good. It treated you well. You carried it off flawlessly.

I promise you Hannah - 7 is lucky. It's different and new but you are ready for it. You will be the best 7 year old that ever was.

My Sadie, who is 4 years old. I will remember the eve of your 4th birthday forever too. We were distracted by the company of friends and you were full of laughs and when suddenly you remembered what you were going to wake up to in about 12 hours. You climbed into my lap on the couch and lay back and said "Can I go to bed now so I can wake up and turn 4?"

Your 4th year of life is going to be as exciting as you anticipated. It's the final year of preschool for you. You will be in "The Big Kid's" class upstairs. You will slowly prepare yourself for kindergarten, surrounded by your friends, loved be each and every one of them. It's a big adventure to turn 4. You told me today that you don't like princesses anymore. I remember the day that Hannah told me that and I do believe that she was 4 years old too. You are following in your sisters footsteps and believe me - those footsteps will not lead you astray.

*This picture was taken in spring 2009. We took a short trip up to Tremblant village. The weather was at least 20 degrees but the bottom of the ski hill was still covered in snow.

A House of Brick

2009-07-13T18:56:00.000-07:00

I yanked you out of your old home and you trusted me. A little reluctantly, but you went along with me and hoped I knew what I was doing. The truth is, I brought you along because I didn't know what I was doing but you make me brave. Welcome to your new home. We have already had three parties in as many weeks. We have all the time in the world to make this place laugh out load while we tell funny stories. This house is a house made to keep our hearts warm and our feet dancing. This house has 4 doors - enough to open wide and let our friends come pouring in, no matter where they are coming from. This house is taller than the others so that we will see it from far away and never ever lose it. This house is made of bricks so the wolf can't blow it down. This house is a home. I picked it for you. I promise to always have a home for you. Welcome home sweet peas!

2009-07-13T18:50:00.000-07:00

"If ever there is a tomorrow when we're not together...there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart...I'll always be with you."

Winnie the Pooh

Christmas Gifts

2008-12-23T04:17:00.000-08:00

Hannah -you started this tradition with me the Christmas you were two years old. That year we hand made gifts for you to give out to all of our family. We spent so long pressing fimo clay into tiny little tin containers with glass lids. Each one got a red ribbon on it so that you could hang the little ornament on your tree, showing off the tiny little snowman inside. You are such an artist that you guide the creative side of the projects now as much as I do. You and I do these handmade gifts every year with Sadie. Last year we made hand rolled bees wax candles with such success that we brought the project back this year. I like them because they can be used to help celebrate the season in the household of whoever is lucky to receive one from you both. They burn beautifully.

This year while we were making them I had an off cut from a sheet of bees wax that was a bit bigger than the other ones. I rolled it up myself and said "Here, this one can be for us. We can burn it on Christmas eve. For Baby Jesus!" We continued to roll a few more and after each one we remembers someone else that we wanted to give a gift to. "This one is for Cam." "This one is for Grandma." " This one is for Joshie." Then I heard one little voice beside me say "This one's for Nana." The little voice on my other side chimed in "We'll burn it for her with God in heaven."

I can't believe I was worried about this Christmas going by without a proper sense of celebration.

What's Your "Self Number"?

2008-12-23T03:58:00.001-08:00

Sadie- you continue to amaze me with how you can cut directly to the point with so few words. You have always placed phone calls to my Mum since she passed away in March. It was so sweet when you started doing that. I am so happy for every day that goes by without you and Hannah forgetting her. Recently though, you have added an imaginative layer to this sweet homage to Nana. You always flip open your toy cell phone and ask me for Nana's "Self Number'. The first few times it happened I tried to correct you. "Do you want her cell phone number?" But you always insisted that it was her "Self Number" that you required to place your call. I always give you the phone number we had when we were growing up. "237-3775". You place the call and then pass me the phone "It's your Mum." I always have a nice conversation with Nana about how we are all doing so well and we miss her and then pass the phone back to you. "She wants to say hi to you." You usually just say "Bye Nana". I guess you know it's me who needs to talk to someone.

This picture was taken on the day of your first "parent presentation" at LynnAnne's dance studio. I am hoping to keep feeding your creative side for as long as necessary - please don't grow out of your imagination. You are in the front row -the only one holding your skirt out in a curtsy.

Christmas 2008

2008-12-12T13:59:00.000-08:00

Here comes Christmas. Am I ever glad I have two girls to show me how to celebrate this year. I have always loved Christmas time. My parents filled the month of December with so much magic that I can't help but get excited every December 1st when I hang the advent calendar for you both. It doesn't matter that the pockets no longer contain treats intended for me. I am actually MORE thrilled to hear your squeals when you run to the calendar each morning than I was when I was the one running to see what the fuzzy felt pocket each day in December. Last week I set up the nativity scene that sat on the mantel at my house when I grew up. It's sitting in front of me now on our fireplace mantel. I can't tell you how many times I re-arranged that scene each holiday season growing up. It was like my Christmas doll house. I am so glad to have it here at our house this year. As Christmas Eve approaches, I have a bit of anxiety about how to keep the magic alive but I think I am missing the point to magic, aren't I? The magic comes to me through you. I'm not sure why or how it will come, but I know that when dusk falls on that night, where ever we are, who ever else we are with, it will be great. I have 35 magic Christmases under my belt as proof. Now it's time for us to look forward to the abundance of magic in the air that follows us everywhere we go.

Children (this passage makes me weep - in the good way!

2008-12-04T08:31:00.000-08:00

From The Prophet by Khalil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Birthday-palooza 2008

2008-07-11T21:46:00.000-07:00

It's 36 hours until we host our third annual Picnic in The Park (or my living room....or picnic at Dada's work, depending on the weather). I have indoor games (just in case) and outdoor games and cakes. I have ordered pizza and ice creams. I have lists and schedules and spreadsheets. I am ready to celebrate your births in the biggest way I can. We are expecting more than 60 people, 30 of which are under-aged. It's gonna be big and bold and memorable.

I love you both to bits. Happy birthday my sweet things.

Hamburger anyone?

2008-07-11T21:39:00.000-07:00

"It doesn't matter whether you want a hamburger for dinner tomorrow night. All that matters is the people who are gone and the people who are still here." a quote from Hannah, age 6.

"Nana died. Poor Nana." a quote from Sadie, age 2.5

Thank you both for continuing to remind me of what matters.

Missed one already

2007-11-11T06:48:00.000-08:00

I missed posting yesterday. That's just the way it goes around here.

I have been plotting out this coming week with careful thought. I have a thousand interesting things to do but they have all collided in one busy week. The fun starts tonight when I go into work for 6:30pm at the theatre for a rental show coming in.

Monday: substitute teaching at Sadie's school
Tuesday: Dave's birthday! The girls are excited
*Wednesday: "Tech Week Widows" dinner with 5 kids and three Mom's - fun!!!
Thursday: Girls night at our house with two out of town friends and one cute baby (I hope Cam comes)!!
Friday: day of prep for catering gig - birthday party for 30 people
Saturday: Birthday both girls are invited to that I am catering in the morning. Birthday party for Hannah to attend in the afternoon.

I will have 3 extra people for the catered lunches I make each day which brings me up to 8 full lunches and two small salads each day. And of course 5 yummy lunches for Hannah and 3 yummy snacks for Sadie. It's a full week alright but I have it all charted and I can manage.

*My friend Laura and I get together when her husband Mitch and Dave have to work long hours at the theatre for a couple of weeks leading up to the Opening of the show they are working on (aka Tech Week). She brings her two girls over after school and we feed them dinner, let them play, pop them into pj's and she takes hers home to bed at the end of a fun night. It's a really good way to get through what is otherwise a very long and lonely stretch of time. Dave typically leaves the house in the morning and isn't home before we are all asleep. The girls find it hard and ask for him a lot but distractions help so much. I am hoping the busy week will make it fly by for them

movie night

2007-11-09T18:18:00.000-08:00

Hannah, you are snoring on the futon mattress on the floor in the living room. Your friend just left after a very successful "pretend sleepover". She's a little young to actually sleep here but she lives close enough to be picked up just before bed.

We started the evening off with soup and grilled cheese and veggies, then moved on to chocolate chip squares and ice cream. After a lot of giggling in the bathroom, pajamas were donned and we hit the living room for a movie and popcorn. And chocolate.......And pretzels.............and a bit more popcorn.

After your friend left, you flopped on the mattress and said "I can't sleep!" Needless to say, you were asleep in less than two minutes. Sweet dreams my beauty. (How could they be anything BUT sweet after all those treats!)

Snow and Lentils

2007-11-08T08:24:00.000-08:00

I have joined a bloggers group to post something every day in the month of November. I have already missed 8 days, but here goes....

There are flakes falling here again today. Yesterday was the first sign of them. You know when the snow is sparse and hard to see.... I'm not sure if it's the disbelief that it's back after months of absence or the fact that the snow is so tiny and spread out that makes it so hard to see. I always have to blink a few times to know if I am seeing right.

I made a pot of lentil soup yesterday, which I haven't done in months. (instinct at the first sign of snow!) In fact, I bet there was still snow in the ground when I made it the last time. It is a recipe that lives only in my head, one that my Dad made countless times when I lived at home. I now make it through the winter months as a really good comfort food. We always have a little white vinegar on the table to splash in your bowl - a nice little brightness in the warm dark soup. I also always make croutons out of whatever bread is sitting around, just like my Dad did (really salty and crunchy). The only part I leave out is the smoked sausage (Dave doesn't know what he is missing out on because I never serve it with meat).

Thanks for the recipe Dad. It's kind of like you are still feeding me after all these years. I will be sure to pass the recipe on the Hannah and Sadie.

Croup

2007-11-05T22:29:00.001-08:00

Sadie - you've got croup and this is the 4th night we've spent glued to each other (just like the picture). You are on the mend now but it's been long for you. I know because you totally lost it at dinner today. You were so determined to be the crankiest. You were drinking from your milk cup when you looked over and noticed that Hannah was drinking from hers too.
"No I'M drinking milk!"

(Hannah and I are guilty here of laughing a little)
"It's NOT funny"
Don't worry Sadie - Hannah and I managed to get you to find the humor in it!

Here you are eating a Clementine at 1:00am - our first box of the season!

Cupcake

2007-10-13T21:28:00.000-07:00

The other day we had a playdate with a new kindergarten friend of yours Hannah. I made mini cupcakes for you to share. Sadie had her friend over too. We had a great little lunch together and a long play. By the time snack time rolled around, there were three cupcakes left. Sadie arrived two seconds too late as the last cupcake was scooped up and she immediately protested. You had your cupcake in you hand and had already taken a bite. Without a single moment of hesitation, you reached across the table and tried to hand Sadie your cupcake (which was exactly what I was wishing I could have done for her at that moment). Of course she was so upset that she refused it anyway but I just thought it was worth marking down. How amazing that you didn't even stop to think about the fact that you would have been the one to be left with no cupcake. Now THAT is what sisters do.

Apple Picking

2007-09-17T18:38:00.000-07:00

Sadie at Preschool

2007-09-17T18:29:00.000-07:00

Sadie - you are amazing me. I took you and Hannah to the Orchard House Family Picnic today and another Mom told me you were her hero. Her son Arman is in your class and he is not feeling too brave about school yet. His Mom sits in class with him every day and she gets the pleasure of watching Arman and YOU (I'm jealous!) and all of your friends enjoying yourselves. She told me how you carry yourself with grace around the classroom, playing and following along with your teachers. She commented on how you are the smallest and one of the youngest but also one of the strongest. You have clearly learned and benefited from having such a great big sister in Hannah. She is proud of you too.

Hannah in Kindergarten

2007-09-04T20:47:00.000-07:00

Hannah - my brave little school girl. Dave and I commented on how we have become so familiar with your "Brave Face". It's so mind blowing to see you trying to keep it all together when you want to burst into tears and hide. We are going into day 3 of Kindergarten and you are struggling so much with everything new. It's so tough for you to go off on your own, needing to take care of yourself but I'm proud of you for doing it anyway. You are clearly going to need a long time to get used to this new crazy trip you are going on but I know you are ready.

When you woke up this morning you started to cry almost right away. "Please!!! Do I have to go to school?" I had to give you the same line I was given 29 years ago by my parents. "Yes, you have to go to school. All children have go to school." At the moment, I am really not sure why you have to go to school but you do so tomorrow is a new day, and the day after that, and the next day too. Let's hope you find yourself soon.

I am also so happy to witness a beautiful sisterhood in the making. When you walked off with your teacher crying on your first day of school I got very teary myself. I was instantly out done by Sadie, who began to sob. I am sure it was partly because she was worried she was missing out but I also know that she was definitely feeling your pain. You have a true friend in Sadie - where ever you go, rest assured she is missing you as much as I am.

I hope that tomorrow you wake up without the butterflies and tears. I hope you gobble down your oatmeal and rush off to get backpack on. I hope you skip all the way to school. But, if you don't, I will take care of you in the best way I know how - for as many days as it takes.

Camping at Oka

2007-07-31T11:01:00.001-07:00

We just got back from a weekend at Oka. Our first time camping there, although we have visited the beach many times before. It was also our first time camping by ourselves and it was so nice to be by ourselves. You girls got such a kick out of all the toads hopping around. I caught one after you went to sleep and took a picture of it in your pink Croc Hannah. He peed on my hand when I picked him up so I left him alone after snapping a quick picture for you.

2007-07-15T18:32:00.000-07:00

How sweet, and a little sad...

This is a photo of Sadie hanging onto my leg on the day of Hannah's preschool graduation.

Sadie- you just recently learned the notion of missing someone when they are not around. I am glad you are developing a full bag of feelings to work with from this point forward but there is a small part of me that wishes I could shield you with my Wonder Woman powers, protecting you from having to miss people you love.

For the past few months you have been fairly pleasant with the good byes. It so much easier to give you a kiss and have you yell "Bye Mama" while I walk all the way down the stairs. About a week ago, you suddenly changed the script on me though. Now at good bye time you reach out for me and start chanting "miss you Mama". It's so amazing how you figure that stuff out all on your own. The concept of missing someone is not easy to explain and I think you're brilliant for figuring it out all by yourself.

2007-07-10T18:46:00.001-07:00

Hannah - Thank you for noticing!

It has been hot today and we spent most of the day walking around and playing in the park. You and Sadie were totally fried and you complained about your feet most of the walk home. After a much needed long bath (full of bubble and giggles), we had dinner on the back balcony. You asked for something to drink. When I got up to get the water, this is the conversation that followed:
You: "I can get the drinks if you want".
Me: "No - you rest, I'll get them."
You: "But you didn't."
Me: "Didn't what?"
You: "Rest."
Me: "Can you tell I'm that tired?"
You: "You are as tired as me. We are all as tired as me. We all need to rest."

Love you Hannah!

2007-07-08T02:34:00.000-07:00

Sadie turned Two!! Happy You You Sadie Jayne!

"Happy You You" has been Sadie's way of saying (and singing) Happy Birthday for the better part of this year.

I am so amazed by my little power house two year old girl. She is small but mighty and makes a smile burst onto my face just thinking about her. All day on Friday, the day before her actual birthday and the day before our huge birthday party, she kept telling me it was time to "go now". I was fairly busy preparing things for the big day and didn't take the time to figure out where exactly we were supposed to be going. When bed time rolled around, she sat up during story time and said "Go now Mama". I asked her where she was going and she said "Happy You You!". I guess she picked up on the fact that there was a pretty special birthday party in the works and thought she ought to be the first one there.

My heart is full of love for my two little girls.

2007-07-08T02:14:00.000-07:00

Another year, another party

We had a double birthday for the girls yesterday. It was just as great as last years party although we had to move it from the park to our house because of weather. We are lucky to have so many really wonderful friends to help us celebrate the birth of our daughters. I haven't done the final count yet but we were right up around 50 people. It was pretty nuts for a while in the dining room, which is where we tend to gather when company is over.

I have this huge dining room table that came from the house I grew up in. It has seen some pretty amazing parties over the years. There have been a lot of laughs and tears shared by a lot of family and friends at that table. I am counting my blessings that my young family is leaving it's marks on this family treasure. Hannah and Sadie have left marker, food, spilled milk and their own tears on it. In fact, just yesterday, Sadie managed to split her lip on it when the tray from her booster seat fell off unexpectedly. I am pretty sure she has left her bright pink blood on it now. The lip is fine and the table is now a part of her too.

2007-07-04T17:57:00.000-07:00

July 4th, 2007 - Hannah is 5 years old today. This is a picture of her on the beach on our camping trip. I have begun to notice how hard she tries to be good to her sister, good to her friends and thoughtful to Dave and I. It makes me very proud; I have every faith that she will know to do the right thing when she is out there on her own, fending for herself in Kindergarten. Dave and I gave Hannah and Sadie a scooter each for their birthday this year. It's so cute to see Hannah scooting along the sidewalk on her hot pick "Razor". She has been asking for a scooter since she was two, so it was a great pleasure to buy her one after all that waiting. Day one of the Surette / Strahl family Birthday week is over.

My First Blog

2007-06-27T17:48:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess I could try to recap the last 34 years or just dive in, so here we go...

Rocket Cheese is a bit of an inside joke around our house. Both Hannah and Sadie have invented some very colourful words that have a lasting power greater than I could have ever expected. Rocket Cheese is the name Hannah gave to Macaroni and Cheese very early in her life. We have called that comfort food by her pet name for it ever since. Choosing a blog name that hasn't been chosen yet is tricky so this is the first one I thought of.

Front Page News

Hannah has lost her first tooth. (June 26th, 2007) The Tooth Fairy found the tiny pearl in a hand sewn pillow with a pocket that Hannah and I made together when she first noticed the tooth was loose. Hannah woke up to find two Loonies and a note saying "Thank you for the beautiful tooth. I can tell that you do a good job of brushing your teeth. Love The Tooth Fairy." Hannah was thrilled. She used the money to buy book 3 in a series she and I have been reading at bedtime called The Fairy Realm, By Emily Rodda. After we read the tooth shaped note, she said "Oh...I was supposed to catch The Tooth Fairy." When I asked her why, she said that she and her friend Nour (from Preschool) wanted to catch her to ask her if they could be Tooth Fairies too.

In other news, the girls both have their birthday's at the beginning of July. Hannah will be turning 5 years old and Sadie will be turning 2.

Hannah just had her Orchard House Preschool Graduation. She will be heading off the Willingdon for Kindergarten in September.

Sadie will be starting preschool at Orchard House in their new location. We had a tour of the new building with one of Sadie's friends, who will be attending school with her in September. This is a picture of Sadie and her friend sitting on the steps of what will become the New Orchard House Preschool. We are very excited for Sadie to follow in Hannah's footsteps. We have had such a good experience with Orchard House that we know that Sadie will thrive there.

Upcoming Events

CAMPING
We are planning to go camping this weekend. Hannah has been camping several times but Sadie has not been camping yet. We just couldn't make it happen last year, so we are long overdue. We have to buy a bit more gear now that we have to fit four in a tent. We won't all fit on one air mattress anymore - especially because Hannah and Sadie are used to sharing a double futon with a toddler bed attached to the side. We bought one extra single mattress and hope that will due for this trip. It adds up when you have to shell out for two of everything. Over the summer, I hope to accumulate another single air mattress and two more sleeping bags but we can make do with blankets and lots of cuddling for this time.

PARTY
Next weekend will be our second annual Family Picnic in MacDonald Park. We will celebrate both Hannah and Sadie's birthdays together with a group of about 60 friends. Last year's party was so much fun that we hope to repeat it year after year.